The Morning Conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama #1

A fictional account of the private morning conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama by Dexter Yarbrough. First in a series.

Michelle: Good Morning, MR. PRESIDENT.

Barack: I must be in trouble. Whenever you start with "Mr. President" I must have done sumthin'. What's up, Michelle? I leave my socks lying around again?

Michelle: Yeah, right. That's an argument for another day. You know I hate sleepin' in separate rooms. Anyway, I hate lyin' to folks!

Barack: Lying about what? That I'm not the anti-Christ! I am, if you believe this crap on the Internet! Ha ha ha!!! Well, you knew when I started campaigning I would have to lie a little!

Michelle: Barack, I'm serious. I hated having to get on national TV last week and tell folks you don't dye your hair. You know you do! Here I am tellin' folks it's the lighting, like people are going to believe that shit. The way the light shines on your head! C'mon now!

Barack: Now Michelle. It's no big deal. You know how these advisers are. Always concerned about my image. So, are you saying you have never lied? Who you foolin'?

Michelle: Lied about what, Barack?

Barack: What about that time back in Chicago, when we were dating, and I ran that red light and got stopped by that white cop?

Michelle: I don't remember that!

Barack: I do. You were afraid I was going to get a ticket and that it was going to ruin my perfect little record. So, you got a pillow from the back seat and put it under your coat and told that cop you were about to have a baby and you needed to get to the hospital!

Michelle: I did not!

Barack: You did! You started moaning and yelling and that cop got nervous and said he would clear traffic and lead us to the hospital.

Michelle: Ha ha ha! We were nobodies then!

Barack: Oh, you remember now, huh?

Michelle: Yeah! When we got to the hospital, that cop turned left to go to the emergency room and I had you to turn right down a side street! That shit was so funny! Here we are flyin' down 95Th Street! That cop is probably still circling the hospital looking for me! Ha ha ha ha!! Whoo! Lawd, I'm about to cry!

Barack: That was so much fun! See, you are prone to tell a fib!

Michelle: Yeah, but not to the whole damn world! Only me, you and that cop know about that thing! Here I am looking like a fool! Anybody with eyes can tell the difference between gray hair and black hair! Lighting or no lighting!

Barack: OK, OK. I'm sorry. I'll try to keep you from having to discuss those kinds of things in public.

Michelle: What's on your agenda for today?

Barack: Catching up with Hilary on this Egyptian thing and meeting with the Joint Chief's to start. What about you?

Michelle: Well, Momma is looking after the girls and I have to meet with the designers for this upcoming state visit.

Barack: Michelle, I was thinkin' the other day how I miss going to the Dixie Kitchen in Hyde Park.

Michelle: Great food there, huh? Man, I do miss it! There are a lot of things I miss, like sleepin' in the same bed with my husband!

Barack: Security! Come grab this crazy lady! Gotta go! Give me a kiss.

Michelle: Kiss my butt!

Barack: No time. Runnin' late. See you later, I need a cigarette!

Michelle: Bye, BARACK!

Stay Tuned for More 'Morning Conversations...' with Barack & Michelle Obama, next time!

Copyright 2011 - Dexter Yarbrough